Post by Rinny on May 7, 2018 16:34:54 GMT
Where have you been? Why have you been so quiet?
Alright, love bugs. I've been answering this to individuals who have been beautiful enough to ask personally but now I think it would just help the process out if I posted on the site officially.
April was a game changing month for me. Sincerely. Long story shortened (lol, bless your hearts for putting up with my wordiness), I've been doing amazingly. As most of you know by now, I have alot of trauma to work through. Not looking for poor-me phrasings, it just is what it is. I don't quite know how to put it into words but, simply, in April I finally found out how to actually start healing. And this has been game changing, life altering, impactful upon levels I am not even fully comprehending myself yet. I cannot express to you how revolutionary this has been for me. I am spending my days surrounded by 10+ books, 3+ journals and tea when I'm not cleaning and the usual Rinny-ness.
Refer to what questions you may have <3
How has this healing-thingy been going for you?
The healing process is going as well as it can be. It's going to take a long time, you know. The way I can describe it is I feel like I was shattered in a million pieces and was surviving in that form for as long as I could remember. But through educating myself and being open minded to how other thought processes in the world could benefit me, I'm getting there, guys. Yay! I have unfortunately been dealing with a flare of PTSD issues through this process and panic attacks but, I mean, it's the process, you know? Those aren't going to poof away with the wave of a fairy princess wand. I'm facing the traumas instead of trying my damndest to live around them as they continue to rot me away. I'm finally armored with the correct knowledge from well educated sources on the subject. And it's lengthy and timely, but I'm getting there. I have a long way to go but I'm already eons healthier and more joyful all around already. (Yay! LOL)
What about you and the website?
I'm still here. The road bump I've discovered through this is that I was using rp and other sources of "fun" as escapism. So without the need for escapism anymore, because I'm facing my traumas now (which is exhausting, I will admit that), I'm finding my past hobbies more difficult to get back into. Because I grew up thinking escapism equaled fun. And that was the case for a long time, makes sense. Well, now I'm having fun in my life. Real life. My reality, not just the fantasies I thrust myself into. I'm going out and reading on a blanket outside in the grass on sunny days. I'm going out for walks. I'm enjoying phone calls more than communicating through text now. I no longer have to hide myself behind a million defensive walls. My reality is no longer a lengthy swim in freezing waters as I try desperately to make it on what oxygen I have to my next relief in whatever escapism I can find. I'm slowly getting to the point I can fully face reality for longer periods of time without breaks of escapism. Panic attacks are the growing pains but I'm getting there.
And just as it is difficult to change any long-term habit, working through the "detaching the concept of escapism = fun" thought process is going to take some time. Because right now, I'm finding what I used to find fun to be ... not fun anymore. It's more of a chore to open up that video game or to try to write a post. And this doesn't mean I don't want to spend time with you guys. I still want those lovely calls and gaming sessions and drinking nights. My relationship with each of you I hold much more precious to me than the fantasies we wrote about. So please keep hitting me up on skype or discord. When I read your message, I will respond. You know me. But, yeah. I've spent so much time burying myself in escapism because my traumas were too much to deal with prior my April meditation breakthroughs escapism was necessary for survival, a good thing during times of stress. Which was wonderful. But now I'm working on unwinding my anxieties and being able to simply enjoy my reality and current moment. Good things! Yay!
I do plan on posting on Inertia again if you guys are still interested in threading with me when I get around to finding posting fun again. <3 It's just going to take me a while to get there and for that I apologize for the wait time.
WITH THAT SAID, I have been approached by some intelligent lads about rights to the website's archives and set-up possibly for a video game opportunity in Florida. For all members who are okay with their characters (as npc's who could be random easter eggs or major plot propelling sources) or plots being used in this medium please give me your permissions through skype messages or post a reply to this thread. Any writings that they do not get permission to use, they will not use them. So you don't have to worry about takey takey of your lovely writings without your knowledge of it. So, I'll be giving you guys updates when I receive them on an apparent Inertia-inspired video game. However, remember that this process may take some time.
Love you all <3
I look forward to future convos with you lovelies. Love love muah <3
Alright, love bugs. I've been answering this to individuals who have been beautiful enough to ask personally but now I think it would just help the process out if I posted on the site officially.
April was a game changing month for me. Sincerely. Long story shortened (lol, bless your hearts for putting up with my wordiness), I've been doing amazingly. As most of you know by now, I have alot of trauma to work through. Not looking for poor-me phrasings, it just is what it is. I don't quite know how to put it into words but, simply, in April I finally found out how to actually start healing. And this has been game changing, life altering, impactful upon levels I am not even fully comprehending myself yet. I cannot express to you how revolutionary this has been for me. I am spending my days surrounded by 10+ books, 3+ journals and tea when I'm not cleaning and the usual Rinny-ness.
Refer to what questions you may have <3
How has this healing-thingy been going for you?
The healing process is going as well as it can be. It's going to take a long time, you know. The way I can describe it is I feel like I was shattered in a million pieces and was surviving in that form for as long as I could remember. But through educating myself and being open minded to how other thought processes in the world could benefit me, I'm getting there, guys. Yay! I have unfortunately been dealing with a flare of PTSD issues through this process and panic attacks but, I mean, it's the process, you know? Those aren't going to poof away with the wave of a fairy princess wand. I'm facing the traumas instead of trying my damndest to live around them as they continue to rot me away. I'm finally armored with the correct knowledge from well educated sources on the subject. And it's lengthy and timely, but I'm getting there. I have a long way to go but I'm already eons healthier and more joyful all around already. (Yay! LOL)
What about you and the website?
I'm still here. The road bump I've discovered through this is that I was using rp and other sources of "fun" as escapism. So without the need for escapism anymore, because I'm facing my traumas now (which is exhausting, I will admit that), I'm finding my past hobbies more difficult to get back into. Because I grew up thinking escapism equaled fun. And that was the case for a long time, makes sense. Well, now I'm having fun in my life. Real life. My reality, not just the fantasies I thrust myself into. I'm going out and reading on a blanket outside in the grass on sunny days. I'm going out for walks. I'm enjoying phone calls more than communicating through text now. I no longer have to hide myself behind a million defensive walls. My reality is no longer a lengthy swim in freezing waters as I try desperately to make it on what oxygen I have to my next relief in whatever escapism I can find. I'm slowly getting to the point I can fully face reality for longer periods of time without breaks of escapism. Panic attacks are the growing pains but I'm getting there.
And just as it is difficult to change any long-term habit, working through the "detaching the concept of escapism = fun" thought process is going to take some time. Because right now, I'm finding what I used to find fun to be ... not fun anymore. It's more of a chore to open up that video game or to try to write a post. And this doesn't mean I don't want to spend time with you guys. I still want those lovely calls and gaming sessions and drinking nights. My relationship with each of you I hold much more precious to me than the fantasies we wrote about. So please keep hitting me up on skype or discord. When I read your message, I will respond. You know me. But, yeah. I've spent so much time burying myself in escapism because my traumas were too much to deal with prior my April meditation breakthroughs escapism was necessary for survival, a good thing during times of stress. Which was wonderful. But now I'm working on unwinding my anxieties and being able to simply enjoy my reality and current moment. Good things! Yay!
I do plan on posting on Inertia again if you guys are still interested in threading with me when I get around to finding posting fun again. <3 It's just going to take me a while to get there and for that I apologize for the wait time.
WITH THAT SAID, I have been approached by some intelligent lads about rights to the website's archives and set-up possibly for a video game opportunity in Florida. For all members who are okay with their characters (as npc's who could be random easter eggs or major plot propelling sources) or plots being used in this medium please give me your permissions through skype messages or post a reply to this thread. Any writings that they do not get permission to use, they will not use them. So you don't have to worry about takey takey of your lovely writings without your knowledge of it. So, I'll be giving you guys updates when I receive them on an apparent Inertia-inspired video game. However, remember that this process may take some time.
Love you all <3
I look forward to future convos with you lovelies. Love love muah <3